I just need to get this out. 

Over the past two days, I have realized how much I really care for my boyfriend. He is sick and not being able to see him at school or hang out with him is making me crazy. Like I’ve become really attached to him, and I never become attached to anyone.

I honestly thought our relationship wouldn’t get anywhere because I’m not an open person and I tend to push people away, but with him it’s different. We’ve only been dating for almost two months but I know that I’m already developing a lot of strong feelings for him. I can’t picture being with anyone else but him.

And on Friday, we were hanging out at his house and things got a little heated. I mean like really heated and we were possibly going to end up having sex. But he stopped and said, “Now would be the time to say something if you want me to stop.” So he stopped and he waited for my response.

I told him that I couldn’t at the moment because I wasn’t ready and he totally understood. He told me that he wouldn’t make me do anything I wasn’t comfortable with. And he told me he loved me and went on about how he’ll always be there for me and he’ll try to be the best boyfriend he can be. It was so sweet and I was speechless.

I didn’t say I love you back because I wasn’t sure at the time but I honestly can say that I think I may love him.

I’m glad I turned him down in eighth grade because if I hadn’t, we probably wouldn’t be together right now <3